The cause of anger and the 3 “magic” words that eliminate it
The primary cause of your anger is the feeling that someone is threatening you, attacking you, hurting or exploiting you. Both anger and fear trigger a battle or flight reaction that causes the attacker to try to escape or resist the attacker. One of the worst aspects of anger is that the more he expresses it, the more he is resurrected, like a fire that lightens. The truth is, the more anger you feel the more it is hurt.
Soon, the expression of anger becomes a habit. The unhappy person reaches a point where even his most insignificant event causes an explosion of anger. He lives his life constantly angry. After a while, he begins to believe that these arguments are normal. What makes people adhere to their anger is their need to recognize that they have been hurt and understood their pain. When you hear someone talking about something that makes him angry or sorry, the best you can do is tell him: “I understand perfectly how you feel. That’s exactly how I would feel if I was in your position. ”
One of the quickest ways to appease someone who has indignated is to show that you identify with him. When people feel that the other is sympathetic, then they can begin to be mentally cured. The main cause of anger is the blame. The basic prerequisite for feeling and expressing any negative emotion is to commit yourself or others on something they did.
In fact, it is impossible to persist for any time in a feeling, if you can not blame someone or something about your anger situation. Once you stop taking classes, dysthymia disappears immediately, like closing a switch. The antidote for malicious emotions is so simple and effective that you may not believe it. People who are injured, angry, and unhappy for years can neutralize their bad feelings almost instantaneously, taking a simple but powerful decision: to take responsibility.
How do you take responsibility?
Just say the words: “I am responsible!” Whenever you are angry or unhappy for some reason, you can fight this feeling by repeating yourself, over and over again, “I am responsible, I am in charge”, until the negative feeling subsides. This is an amazing method that radically transforms the life of anyone who applies it.
Under the replacement law, your mind can only focus on one thought at a time. It can stand in the positive feeling of personal responsibility or the negative feeling of anger or blame. But not both at the same time. The choice is always yours. All you can control in the universe is your conscious mind and its contents. If you choose to focus on the positive thinking of “I am responsible” and not the negative thought that causes you misery, you automatically become positive, optimistic and take control of the situation. Sometimes, it takes just a few minutes.
Since all negative feelings are based on blame, the antidote is simple: instead of blaming, you take responsibility for the situation. When you take full responsibility for the situation, the malicious emotions are instantly falling, as if you were putting a brake on the car.
It is impossible to take responsibility for a situation and at the same time remain angry or unhappy with it. Acceptance of responsibility cancels all the dissatisfaction related to the particular situation (or the individual) and makes you regain control.